Samantha Edwhan

Alita's Youth

Chapter 9

Autumn 2834

“Hey, Liam? Can I ask you something?”

Liam looked at Alita as she sat down beside him. They were in their family’s nook in the caves. Their parents weren't there. They'd gone out hunting despite the rain drizzling outside.

“Sure, what is it?” Liam asked.

“It’s about Kailey,” Alita admitted. “I'm not sure what to do.”

Liam raised an eyebrow. “I'm not exactly experienced in dating, you know. Wouldn't Mum or Dad give better advice?”

Alita shrugged her wings. “Maybe, but I don't really want to talk to them about this. You see, it's been six months since we started dating and, well, I don't really think about her much.”

“Oh, wow, that's not where I thought you were going with that at all,” Liam said.

Alita shot him a look. “Where did you think I was going with that?”

Liam waved a wing. “Nevermind that. You said you don't think about her?”

“Yeah. I know when dragons date they're supposed to be all about each other, you know? It's supposed to be some amazing thing where the world is different and all you want is to be with each other.” Alita hung her head. “But I don't feel like that at all. Most days I think of my other friends first.”

Liam was quiet for a moment. “Tell me again how you two got together.”

Alita’s mind scrambled to remember the day. It was only six months ago, yet she struggled to remember it. “Uh… she said I was cute.”

Liam blinked, then asked, “Is that it?”

“Well, she had this whole speech, I guess, about how I had my friends and she wanted to feel important to me. Um, I called her cute too and she said the next step would be dating each other,” Alita explained.

“And how did you feel about that?” Liam asked.

“Honestly, I don't know anymore.” Alita shrugged her wings. “But when we touched noses it didn't really feel like much.”

“Does it feel any different now?” Liam asked.

Alita shook her head. “No. I keep waiting for it to feel like something, but… nothing changes.”

Liam hummed and looked like he was thinking. “Maybe you're not a dragon who wants or needs romance. Or you might not find her attractive in particular. Either way, it sounds like you aren't really interested in having this relationship.”

Alita nodded. That made sense. More so than anything Kailey had said six months ago.

“So what do I do?” she asked.

Liam took a breath. “Honestly, it sounds like your relationship with Kailey is going to fail one way or another. Relationships take work from both- or all?- parties. If you don't want to put in the work, you should probably break up with her now.”

“It's not that I don't want to,” Alita said quickly. “I've tried. But if I don't actively try, she's not my first thought, or my second… or my third.”

She trailed off as she realised how terrible that sounded.

Liam nodded. “It sounds like a breakup is the best choice then.”

Alita nodded along with him, staring at the ground. Then she looked up at him. “But won't that upset her? She's so happy. I don't want to hurt her.”

Liam sighed. He wrapped a wing around Alita and pulled her closer, ducking his head and lowering his voice. “Alita, I know you hate hurting others and you hate it when dragons fight. But this is Tribe-Ali. The males fight in spars all the time and everyone feels the strain of heartbreak at some point. For most, it's because Tribe Law forbids us from following our hearts. Others have differences that they can’t work out, which can even happen amongst friends. What you should worry about is what will be best for you and your life first. If you don't want to be with Kailey, then don't. And don't stay with her just because breaking up would upset her.”

Alita nodded slowly. Then she sighed and stared at the floor. “You're right. I… I should get it over with then.”

“You're doing it now?” Liam blinked at her as she pulled back.

“Yeah,” Alita muttered.

She turned and made her way out of the nook and began walking through the tunnels. Kailey was likely in her own family’s nook further in the caves. She would look there first.

Alita’s pace was slow as she made her way through the tunnels. The heaviness of what she was about to do weighed on her like a boulder. She almost wished the tunnels would collapse on her before she got there, but they'd been standing for hundreds of years so a cave in now was unlikely.

When she finally reached Kailey’s nook she poked her head in and spotted Kailey and Michael resting inside. Kailey’s head popped up and she grinned.

“Alita! Did you want to hang out?” she asked.

“Uh, I wanted to talk to you, actually,” Alita said. She hoped her trembling didn't come through in her voice. “Can you come out here for a moment?”

“Of course.” Kailey got up and merrily trotted out of the nook to join her.

Alita led her up the cave a little so that they weren't too close to any of the nooks, then turned to face her.

“Kailey, I, uh, well...” Alita was already struggling to find the right words.

“Is something wrong?” Kailey asked, tilting her head.

Oh dear, this isn’t going to go well, Alita thought to herself. She took a steadying breath, then said, “We need to break up.”

Kailey’s face paled. Her ears drooped and her eyes widened. “What? W-why?”

“B-because… because this relationship isn’t fair on you… or me either, I guess,” Alita admitted. “Whenever I think of someone to hang out with, I think of my friends. I usually only remember you when I see you or someone else brings it up. A-and… and… well, you don’t always consider what I would want either.”

Tears were welling in Kailey’s eyes. Alita felt her heart crack. She already hated doing this, but it had to be done. She couldn’t always escape conflict.

“But we love each other,” Kailey breathed.

Alita shook her head, wincing at herself and how she was hurting Kailey. “You love me. I… I don’t love you like that. I’m sorry.”

Kailey’s breath hitched and she stepped back. Tears flowed down her cheeks. “Y-you’re sorry? After everything we’ve been through, you’re telling me it was all fake, and you’re sorry?”

Her voice was rising and echoing off the walls. Alita stepped back too, aware of her ears pulling back and her tail flicking uncomfortably. She prepared for more but Kailey’s voice cracked on her next word and she turned and ran. Alita took a few shaky steps back, watching where her tail had disappeared, before turning and heading back to her nook.

Liam’s head popped up off the floor when she entered. “Are you okay?”

Alita squeezed her eyes shut. Of course he didn’t need to ask how it went. He probably heard Kailey’s voice echoing in the tunnels. She sat down heavily and hung her head. She wasn’t sure what she could say, or if she could even speak without her voice breaking.

Liam’s wing wrapped around her and he pulled her close. “I know it’s hard, Alita. But sometimes that’s the way things go. Just because you mutually agreed to date doesn’t mean the breakup will go as smoothly.”

Alita nodded slightly. Even as she thought back on their relationship, she wasn’t sure it had even started mutually. But she wasn’t about to say that out loud. It was hard enough hurting someone like that. Saying she may not have even wanted the relationship at all would just hurt more.